I always seem to turn my head to your usual direction
Hoping I’d see your face
I hate that you gave me these handful of memories
For me to reminisce during rainy days
Do you know how much i want to stop liking you?
To stop thinking about you
To stop these feelings from crushing me
But i don’t want to forget you
See the conflict there?
I want you to be in my life at the same time not
I sometimes picture us
Or try to
Because every time I do, I let it go
Because even my fantasies know it can never be
I don’t know what’s more painful
You not here with me
Or me without you
