When I was 13 I would walk into a bookstore looking for the latest YA novel now as a 20-something I go straight to the self-help section. I understand I am only 22 years old and shouldn’t be too consumed with the stressors of everyday life. But here I am writing about how I need more self-help books. I even have a podcast playlist devoted to self-improvement and finding motivation. Currently, I am listening to The Minimalists, The Daily Boost, and Happier with Gretchen Rubin. Because I want to improve and motivate myself.
Then I scroll through my Social Media again that’s when my self-esteem starts to peel away. It felt like exercising and skin-care didn’t seem enough to me. I scroll through Instagram loathing myself because my life doesn’t have an aesthetic filter. Do I need a new wardrobe like my colleagues? Do I need to bother my boyfriend for an engagement ring? Should’ve I said yes to that previous job offer? I felt lost and read too many inconsistent articles on the internet. I needed other sources.
It’s No Longer Escapism

For the past year, I have had a reading slump. Before I would be able to read at least three books in one week. Now I could barely finish the books I’ve bought. Most of them are barely finished and some of them I take ages to flip through. So far the only book I have intended on finishing was “Turtles All The Way Down” by John Green. But when I was casually looking around a bookstore I came across a book about clearing your mind. I forgot the title but I was able to breeze through the pages while I waited for my boyfriend.
I used to read to escape reality. I wanted to travel through worlds and meet different people without leaving my room. A book was able to distract me long enough for me to forget about the world. Now, all I think about is my reality; the ongoing job hunt, the fear of unemployment, and if there was still food in the fridge. I couldn’t switch off reality. I spend most of my days reading me emails than reading ten pages of a book. But when I picked up that random self-help book and tore through how many pages I realized something – I needed help figuring out my life.
Self-Improvement and Self-Care
I’ve mentioned in a previous blog post I have been exercising regularly and trying to sit less. It was the first step for me improving my life. Aside from sweating it out, I also adopted a new skin regime. I’ve bought face masks and strips that match my skin type. At first, I wanted to learn makeup but after evaluating my skin I realized I needed to take care of that first. So, I was focused on my physical care but I also need intellectual, mental, and emotional care.
This tiny changes to my routine are helping me. I’m in much better moods because of the endorphins coursing through my body. I am eating healthier more greens, more fruits, and went back to my no-chip rule.

Where I Want To Be
I honestly want to improve myself and live a better lifestyle. So walking into the Self-help section made me want more help achieving that. Scouring books hoping to find nuggets of advice I realized I shouldn’t only rely on dozens of advice from different experts and authors. I have to take action on being more inspired, motivated, and better. Sure buying one or two self-help books would help but it would only give me the illusion of getting better.

At the moment I am saving up for “The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F*CK: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life” by Mark Manson. It was recommended to me by a friend and I realized I gave way too many fucks. I am also looking for “The Life-Changing Magic Of Tidying Up” by Marie Kondo. I need those two books because clean space applies to my room and my soul. I waste my energy on things that shouldn’t even be bothered. Since I was young I always trusted books. Maybe as a 22 year old millennial contemplating her existence books can help now too.
Are you interested in borrowing my copy of The Subtle Art? Or are you more inclined on owning your own copy? 🙂 HMU and let me know 🙂
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