I keep forgetting I’m only 25

Last night, all I did was stare at the ceiling. It was a moment of reflection and existential panic. It felt like the room was filled with every worry my anxiety can create. Leaking through the cracks on the wall, I felt it slowly suffocating me. My ears tried to drown in the noise of …

Too Many Letters in the ABCs of LGBTQIA+

Was supposed to post this for Pride Month so better late than ever. To all the beautiful folks in the LGBTQIA+ community. They say the problem with our generation is that we are obsessed with labels. We are narcissistic that we need a word for who we believe we are and inconveniencing others to remember. …

Journaling Poetry for my Pandemic Anxiety

Writing is a muscle and you have to regularly exercise it –sadly, I don’t even exercise physically for me to practice it creatively. People automatically assume this pandemic is like a relaxing creative retreat where we don’t have any excuses to be productive. Sadly, my brain is on survival mode and filled with constant anxiety. …

An Agoraphobiac in a Closet

When I was 13, I built myself a closet to suffocate in my non-existent heterosexuality. Decorated the walls pink and blue, hoping it would feel like home.  I grew up thinking there was only gay or straight, no other option. So, I spent half of my life having a gay identity crisis.  Then you came …

Afraid to be your reason

My biggest fear in a relationship is someone giving up everything for me. Their identity, dreams, friends, and create this new life around me. I am afraid they would slowly brew resentment, listing down regrets and what-ifs they forgot to consider. I’m afraid when the days are silent, they create scenarios of decisions they never …

Coming Out: I’m Here, Proud and Queer

I am bisexual. I don’t know the percentage I fall under because for the most part I mostly lean towards anyone I find appealing. Whether it’s their personality or how their presence makes me feel, gender was never part of my type. If you want to go a little technical then I can safely say …

Pieces of Peace: An Old Routine

I found myself in somebody else’s bed again. I’ve already mastered this routine, a few bottles here and there. Now I’ve lost my phone in this unfamiliar mess. Tip-toeing the hallways, finding pieces of my self-worth scattered on the floor. There are times, I’d wake up next to a stranger and other days I see …

Pieces of Peace: For Every Person I’ve Been With

I was thirteen-years-old when I had my first kiss.  It was wet. I didn’t understand what was happening. Was it supposed to feel this way? I’ve watched enough teen sitcoms and romantic comedies to know how a kiss should look like. Assuming it felt as great as having a killer soundtrack while you’re making out. …